Speech Modification Program – 3-Step Screening

At my recent "Say it Like You Mean it" panel event, Speech-Language Pathologist and Accent Modification Expert Marci Macaluso and I presented a speech modification program and a 3-Step Screening for your own personal audit.  Here it is below along with an option to get in touch regarding setting up an individual or group training.

Let us know how you do!

Speech Modification Program – 3-Step Screening

1. What are the verbal tics, fillers and crutches that you want to train against?  (Please circle.)

ü  Like

ü  Ya Know

ü  Whatever

ü  Totally

ü  Literally

ü  Basically

ü  I mean

ü  I can’t

ü  Um

ü  Uhh

ü  So

ü  (Other?)

2. Record yourself using your cell phone or video camera in conversation with a friend.  What are you noticing?

ü  Verbal tics (discourse markers, e.g. “like, ya know, whatever”)

ü  Filler words (um, uhh)

ü  Vocal fry (a.k.a. creaky voice - the low, staccato vibration during speech that arises at the end of sentences)

ü  Uptalk (upward glide that ends statements or proclamations in a question mark?)

ü  Baby talk (higher pitched voice then your usual tone)

ü  Apologizing (starting a sentence with “I’m sorry, etc.”)

ü  Speaking in text/social media terms (using acronyms and abbreviations – e.g. OMG, LOL, BRB)

3. Are you speaking articulately, with confidence and presenting your best self?

If not, are you interested in exploring our speech modification program? Email at audrey@manncroninpr.com)

ü  Group setting

ü  One-on-one training

Top 10 Tips to Say it Like You Mean it!

Speaking articulately and with confidence is paramount to our success!  

I know you have heard me say that before:-).  But, at my recent panel presentation, I offered a top 10 list to Say it Like You Mean it.  I hope my audience found the list helpful and I wanted to share it here with my wonderful blog community.  

So here it is...And, if you'd like, please sign up to receive my blog via email...

10 Tips to:

Say it Like You Mean it!

1.     Be aware of your own verbal tics:  Do you say “like,” “ya know,” “whatever,” “totally,” etc.?  Hone in on what unnecessary words pepper your speech with mindless repetition and work on getting rid of them.

2.     Learn to brave the pause:  Instead of filling what should be empty spaces in our speech with “ummms” and “ahhs,” take a breath and allow yourself and your colleagues to absorb your thoughts and ideas.

3.     Speak with conviction and avoid “uptalk.”  The upward glide or “uptalk” that ends would-be statements in a question mark is often used by women to gain consensus and likeability, however, it does not inspire confidence.

4.     What happens in rehearsal ends up on stage:  Before an important interview or presentation, rehearse in front of a video camera.  You may be surprised at your own verbal crutches, and the videotape doesn’t lie.

5.     Find a great speech from an eloquent speaker (e.g. Hillary Clinton, Sheryl Sandberg, FDR) and read it aloud.  Hearing what good writing sounds like will reinforce good communication habits and help you develop your own voice.

6.     Avoid the baby voice trap:  To feign innocence, illicit sympathy and seem appealing to men, some women raise the pitch of their voices.  Don’t.

7.     Stop apologizing: Don’t be afraid to say what you want.  It is not necessary to start sentences with, “If you don’t mind,” or “I’m sorry, but…”

8.     Leave vocal fry to the Kardashians. Inspired by our celebrity stars, a new study finds that this pop-culture “creaky voice” that has found its way into our speech patterns may affect women’s chances of getting and keeping a job.   

9.     Enlist your own personal verbal coach: Yes, it will be irritating for both parties, but find someone you trust who is willing to call out your verbal tics, correct and refine them.  

10.  Keep your social media feeds clean: What you write on social media channels translates into how you are perceived.  Make sure your competence shines through in the written word as well.

"Like, Hire Me?" - A Parody of How NOT to Write a Job Cover Letter

Girls and young women are watching, listening, and parroting back the way young pop culture icons are communicating. And our social media channels are enabling the easy and instant sharing of these new verbal fashion trends.  But what happens when our personal written communication manifests itself in our professional communication?

To illustrate how ridiculous our speech patterns have become, I thought it would be fun to collaborate with my 15-year-old daughter Amanda and craft a professional correspondence, maybe a job cover letter, written by a young women who is unknowingly but fully entrenched in what I have been calling, the “Like, Ya Know” syndrome - replete with hashtags, text messaging slang, selfies and words written in vocal fry for emphasis.

Amanda and I had a great time both writing and filming this Youtube video parody, “Bethenny’s Cover Letter: Like, Hire Me?”  And, thank you to our talented videographer, Peg Cashman!

Like, enjoy!

BETHENNY TAYLOR

50 Gurrl Street, Totally, TX 75211

555-555-5555

heyitsbethenny@hotmail.com

Human Resources Manager

My Fav Shoe Company

7 Perf Place

Fashionista, CA 90210

Dear Human Resources Manager,

So, like I am applying for the, ya know, bitchin job you posted on your website?  The ad caught my eye because it was #totesswaggyyy and I need a job to support my #loveofshoes and other shopping habits.  Btw, the candy apple red nail polish in your ad is like totally awesome.  I loveee!  Already, you can see we would make a perfect match.  

As you will see on my attached resume, Instagram (@kittenlover245) and selfie, I am superrr gorg and popular (826 Besties) and have worked at Shoe Heaven, Forever22 and stacked nail polishes at Posh Nails.  With all of my experience, I am sure I can help My Fav Shoe Company achieve like whatever it is it wants to achieve??? #doesthatmakeanysense #2amlogic #brbmybrainisexploding. So, ya know, why should you hire me?  Well, umm, ahh, like, I’m not a fake model, can walk in 6” heels, and am good with people, and whatever…  

I mean, I can’t, I can’t, I literally can’t even imagine how awesome it would be to work for such a damnnn hottieee company.  I will text you to discuss the possibility of setting up a meeting to ummm, discuss ways I can work on behalf of your company (OMGGG, did I just say that? Awkward!)   

TBH, I would make a great employee!

Thank uuu!

Peace Out,

Bethenny Taylor 

According to CBS Sunday Morning's Faith Salie, "America's young women are running out of oxygen."  

This is how Salie explains the vocal fry epidemic - the irritating creaky voice that makes girls/women sound underwhelmed and disengaged.  She cites a recent study that finds that 2/3 of women in college are using this glottalization.  If you don't know what it sounds like, it will become all too familiar when you listen to this piece.   Ohhh myyy...http://www.cbsnews.com/videos/faith-salie-on-speaking-with-vocal-fry/

We, Like, Need a Better Game Plan

As fate would have it, I recently found myself as the front-seat-driver privy to five teenage girls in the backseat playing “One Minute Madness,” otherwise known as “The Um Game.”  The object is to talk about a given topic for one solid minute without saying the words “um,” “like,” or “ya know.”  Topics ranged from the mundane (stop signs) to the icky (ear wax) and as they laughed their way through it, they all agreed that the game was surprisingly challenging.  (I swear on my copy of “Do you Speak American?” that I did not put them up to this.)

How terrific that teenage girls are game for a new game that challenges their ability to speak without verbal tics and crutches!   

The fact is, we do need a better game plan – or more games and better strategies - to help young girls/women modify their speech patterns so the sound of their own voices don’t get in the way of their success.  

Just a few days ago, Christina Sterbenz, a young writer at Business Insider, contributed a trend story entitled, “Are These Common SpeechHabits Bringing You Down?”  She says, “How you say something matters as much as, like, what you say.  If you want to get your ideas across, then pay attention to certain controversial speech habits becoming increasingly more common.”

Sterbenz covers six of the most common trends, many of which I have covered in this blog: 

1. Vocal Fry 

2. Uptalking 

3. Beginning sentences with “so” 

4. Saying “Um” and “Ah” 

5. Saying “Like” 

6. Clearing your throat  

All six trends have video accompaniments.  Former News Anchor Connie Chung does a great piece on uptalking, interviewing both a linguist on her thesis and Villanova college students on this contagious rise in our intonation that turns our proclamations into questions.   

It is enlightening (if not a bit disturbing), to watch the YouTube videos of mega star pop idols showcasing their own mindless affectations including Kesha’s creaky vocal fry, Taylor Swift’s “um” syndrome and Justin Bieber’s innumerable “likes.”

For mega stars and mere mortals alike, games like, “One Minute Um-Madness” (my combined new title) and maybe even a modified version of the word guessing party game Taboo (switched up so you are not allowed to fall prey to verbal tics) are fun and effective exercises to help us rid ourselves of the verbal fillers, vocal fry and the “like” syndrome. It is all about awareness and modeling the right speech behaviors.  However, it is tricky. 

According to speech/language pathologist Marci Macaluso, “You need to be conscious of your speech pattern at the same time that you are being spontaneous in your conversation.  There are different strategies for shaping these behaviors.  But, you really need to commit to changing, because it takes a lot of practice.”

We all want to present our best selves.  No matter our chosen professions, internships or leadership positions, we don't just need to dress for success, we need to speak to impress!  But how do we find our own authentic voice, and one not riddled with like, ya know, whatever?

At the upcoming panel presentation on September 18th, 7-9pm at the Chappaqua Library, we will discuss all of this – the socio-linguistic trends (aka verbal fashion trends) including verbal tics and crutches, vocal fry and social media's affect on our speech patterns.  There will be tips and tricks as well and as an opportunity to learn more about a speech modification program. And, I am so thrilled that I will be joined by Speech/Language Pathologist Marci Macaluso, Writopia Lab Director Lena Roy and Human Resources Consultant Pam Schiffman.  

Like, hope to see ya there!:-)

Blurred Lines of Communications: Today's Text Messaging, Emoji-ing, Hashtagging Culture

In this increasingly warped universe where you never know where the next viral phenomenon will emerge, Weird Al Yankovic (musical parodist from the late 1970s) may have done more than he intended with his latest video parody, “Word Crimes”  (set to Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” and with 12.5 million views at this posting.) 

Although linguists are having a hey day critiquing Weird Al’s satirical take on our generation’s errant grammar (it’s true), they may be missing the greater message – or warning – to “wise up” and “listen up.”  This new world of online social communications is having an impact on how we are perceived and maybe even on our school and career trajectory.   Consider his opening lines (minus the hey, hey, heys and woos):   

Everybody Shut Up

Everyone listen up

If you can't write in the proper way, (lousy writer!)

If you don't know how to conjugate,


Hey!
 Maybe you flunked that class!


And maybe now you find,


That people mock you onliiiiiiiine! 
(Everybody wise up!)


Hidden amongst all the jazzy graphics and word play, Weird Al implores, “make literacy your mission,” and “show the world you are not a clown.”   

So, are we the most inarticulate generation to come along?

While I always think it’s a “Good time to learn some grammar,” much of what Weird Al is parodying are not “Word Crimes,” but new forms of digital communications that are transforming how we converse with friends and family alike.  We are not “incoherent,” we just need to figure out how and when to use these new forms and for what purpose. 

Take text messaging (or SMS – short message service). While I’m not a fan of all those additional letters that try to underscore a point (paaarrrttyyy!!!), and the misspellings that might be cute (peepl), I do give the thumbs up to the inherent convenience and time-efficiency of replacing words with one letter (“are” with “r”) or replacing letters with numbers (gr8!) - perfectly appropriate for a quick check in with friends and family; but not perfectly appropriate in a college essay or a job seeking cover letter.  And, those OMGs, LOLs, and BRBs are IMO (in my opinion) creative, trendy, sometimes crude, and often times hilarious.  

Are you fluent in emojis?  Using Emojis, or replacing words with characters, is lots of fun and here to stay as described in this Jessica Bennett NY Times story, “Emoji Have Won the Battle of Words.”  According to Bennett’s research, the website Emojitracker finds that people are averaging 250 to 350 emoji tweets a second!  And “emoji” was crowned as this year’s top-trending word by the Global Language Monitor, and was added to the Oxford English Dictionary.  But what I find most exciting is emoji’s potential to break down cultural language barriers.  If enough characters are created and standardized, this new symbolic system could be used to communicate no matter what language you speak.  

And then there are #hashtags. Although hashtags were created as searchable, group-able, metatags to be used in social marketing channels (e.g. Twitter, Instagram), you’ve no doubt noticed that they have taken on a life of their own, as spoofed in this clip of Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake, “#Hashtag” which, at the time of this posting, had 25,362,548 views!

My 21-year-old-niece is known by her friends as “The Hashtag Queen.”  As a proud and clever Millennial, she, like her peers, has turned hashtagging into a speaking style, and maybe even a new art form.  Here’s an example of one of her recent, spontaneous Instagram hashtag “poems”:

Having a good eyebrow day.

#lovethyself

#lovethyselfie

#whosaysthyanymore

#letsbringitback

#thy

Hilarious.

But here’s the thing…how do we resolve all of these new forms when it comes to school and career?  Do text messages, emojis and hashtags have a place in communications when we want to impress?   When we want others to listen up?  And, how about in our professional lives?   

My son’s religious-school teacher is brilliant, a terrific storyteller and has her own successful blog.  Over dinner, she told us that her fiancé recently accused her of “still speaking in her text voice,” (she admittedly threw an OMG into their conversation).  Can she blame it on teaching kids all day?

This spurred on a conversation about using your “text voice” in the work place.  She had been put in charge of reviewing resumes from potential job applicants.  “Some were great,” she said, “But the text speak has infiltrated their resumes.  Some really needed to review their grammar, get rid of the casual speak, and understand that ‘Btw’ doesn’t belong in a resume.  And, when it came to the job applicant’s voice messages, I’m not sure that they were ever taught how to use a phone.”

(What is the deal with the telephone and kids’ inability to use this old-school contraption for a productive conversation?  I’ll get to that in my next blog…)

So, Thank you Weird Al for a gr8 video, chock full of great advice.  It’s true.  We all need to “familiarize ourselves with the nomenclature” and stop using verbal tics like, “like.” But no Weird Al, it’s not a crime to play with syntax, emoji or LOL.  Truth be told, we are now living through a sociolinguistic transformation brought on by the ubiquitous Internet.  And, like most things in life, there is a time, a place and a hashtag.   

I’d love to hear your thoughts and stories.  Feel free to post your comments – all forms accepted!

Isn’t it great when science backs us up?  The recent study from researchers at the University of Miami and Duke University has led to a national conversation since they found that vocal fry may undermine the success of young women in the labor market.

The story has rightly been covered by a host of women’s magazine as well as NPR, TIME and The Atlantic, which hit the jackpot when it found a video clip of Zooey Deschanel, the “new girl,” or shall we say, the “fry girl,” showcasing this verbal fashion trend at its most irritating and ear-bending. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jknxy1zxens&feature=youtu.be

But, what about boys and men; are they also riddled with verbal tics, up-speak and vocal fry? 

Betheny Brookshire at Science Magazine reported that previous studies have looked at vocal fry only in women, but this recent study in the online journal of PLOS looked at men too and found that “while both men and women suffered from the use of vocal fry, women suffered more.” 

She was able to point to one male offender, Ira Glass of “This American Life.”

An unscientific survey of my friends’ boys has revealed that they also are riddled with the “like syndrome.”  At a recent noisy Bar Mitzvah celebration, a friend told me that her son drove her crazy saying “like,” “the entire car ride over.” She was like, ready to strangle him!

GQ Magazine Reporter Renee Dale’s recent story entitled, “I like, love you?” makes a hilarious case that men are also part of this sociolinguistic scourge.  She examines upspeak – when a would-be statement ends instead in a high-rising intonation and lands as a question.  She says, “Male upspeak is the scariest trend since man-leggings: Dudes are starting to sound like extras from Clueless.”   And, Dale gives an example spoofing our political leaders. 

Obama to Putin: "We need you to, like, stop invading Ukraine?" 

Putin to Obama: "Um, I'd like to see you try and stop me?"

What about other male verbal crutches?  How about all of the cursing?  It’s no surprise that boys and men interject curses into their speech to make them sound powerful and cool – but is it F-ing necessary!?  Some men I know can’t even get out a sentence without a few F-bombs carelessly dropped.

According to Speech-Language Pathologist Marci Macaluso, “Cursing says, ‘I speak your language. We're in the same club dude. It's tribal.”

  

And, then there is the mumble factor, or lazy-lip syndrome. Check out this YouTube video of two young men illustrating why men need to stop mumbling. They claim that mumbling is a side-affect of social anxiety, especially when it comes to women and dating.  (Are we really that intimidating?).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkEyWsB2ovA

It starts early.  A friend of mine is a 5^th grade English teacher.  Her explanation?  “To lessen their accountability, boys mumble, talk really fast, or qualify their ideas with, “what I mean is…”

So, yes, boys and men do it too.  They are also guilty of the "likes," the upspeak, as well as their own verbal crutches including cursing and mumbling.  However, are they judged as harshly as girls and young women?  

According to Lena Roy, young adult author and director of the Westchester branch of Writopia Labs, “Although we are gallantly striving towards breaking away from a patriarchal society, it's still so much easier to dismiss girls and women because of vocal tics. In the same breath, I think that lack of confidence is equal opportunity.”

What do you think?  Does a woman’s success depend more on the sound of her voice than a man's?